Things I Never Thought I’d Do

On the way home from driving the kids to school (25 miles in morning rush hour traffic) I was listening while laughing at a discussion on the radio. They were discussing things they never thought they’d say before they were parents. I was thinking about the many ways that applies to me, and I was thinking (and Tweeted) about the time I (honest, I swear!) said, “Gage, get off the roof!” He was nine.

I started to think of the ridiculous things I’ve had to do because of special needs.

1. Hold down my child with my legs and give them a shot.

2. Drive countless times back and forth to hospital/doctors’ offices to retrieve a stuff animal or blankie for comfort.

3. Cry on the phone with pharmacies, insurance companies, hospital staff and in school meetings.

4. Joke about death, cramming meds down throats, my marriage breaking up, and using the special needs card to get a favor or two with sympatric souls.

5. Be able to memorize countless medications and schedules, names of diseases, disorders and symptoms.

6. Buy a (weighted) blanket to the tune of $150 and several other various expensive pieces of therapeutic equipment.

7. Easily let go of friends who didn’t “get” my new life.

8. Let my kid eat prepackaged sandwiches for dinner because it meant calories.

9. Spend several days repairing walls, doors, and floors as a result of rages.

10. Become a fierce fighter and protector.