I’m sure that my daughter with ADHD has some sensory issues, in fact we did some sensory interventions with her when she was younger and before the ADHD diagnosis. I’m not sure that they helped much, except for brushing which she seemed to really like once she stopped fighting against it. But we’ve got a pattern of sensory overload behaviors that I’m wondering if anyone else recognizes, deals with, or maybe has any suggestions for.

The scenario: It’s the end of the day and we get in the car to drive home (a ten minute drive). We chat a bit about her day. Then it’s her sister’s turn to chat about her day. Suddenly, the oldest starts hollering at her sister to stop yakking. She suddenly has a terrible headache and she can’t stand one more minute of her sister talking. She then proceeds to rant the entire rest of the ride home about how no one listens to her, no one cares about her headache, and etc.

I recognize the fact that after a long day, she has transitional overload. It would be great if the world would just shut up and let her chill and adjust. But it’s always after she’s had her say, and always just as her sister is starting her turn. Once we’re home, if she can get away – go watch tv for a little bit, go be alone in her room – she usually pops right out of it. Having those options removed (like having her tv privileges revoked because her words are just so gosh darn mean) keep the ranting going for a good long while.

I’ve tried talking to her at a later time, and she admits to feeling overloaded in the car and all. But as soon as the conversation gets to things she can do (as she must learn to, the world will not accommodate her), I lose her completely.

She is a first child, she is an attention seeker, and she rants to relieve whatever she is feeling inside that is uncomfortable. But she can’t just shut her sister down every time she starts to share. And I’m at a loss at how to turn the situation around.

That would be awesome were it closer. Next year it will be good because her school is right across the street from our house. In the warmer months, when she gets home she will often go out back and play and it does help a lot.

I think she partly has difficulty with transitions, partly has sensory issues, and partly just doesn’t want to share any attention with her sister. (You’d think by 11 she’d have started to out grow that, but I guess that might be unrealistic hope on my part.) Today’s ride home was better – mostly I just didn’t engage with her (which I always forget! duh!). I suspect that we’re getting to an age where hormones might begin to play a part as well, though she’s always had no filter and when she’s anxious or frustrated or whatever, what goes through her mind comes right out her mouth.

Thanks for the suggestions, Andy!